Chapter 10
That night, Samuel didn’t leave. He slept in the room where Toby and I had once slept.
I had no idea what was going through his mind. After years of ignoring us, who was he performing this act of sentimentality for
now?
The next morning, Samuel drove into town and bought some farming tools like sickles and shovels. When he returned, he rolled up his sleeves and started clearing the weeds in the overgrown courtyard.
It was July, and it was the peak of summer. The sun blazed relentlessly, and there wasn’t a hint of a breeze. Samuel focused solely on cutting the weeds. He trimmed the unruly roses and hydrangeas as if he couldn’t feel the scorching heat.
When he was thirsty, he drank bottled water. When he was hungry, he ate the bread he’d bought in town. He meticulously cleaned the rooms that hadn’t been touched in three years, leaving only the white chalk outlines of me and Toby untouched.
Sometimes, he lay beside the outlines. He stretched out his arms as if pretending to hold me and Toby in his embrace.
I watched his performance silently, feeling my body grow lighter and lighter. I gradually understood why I had been unable to
leave this world.
It was the deep resentment between me and Samuel anchoring me to this world. If I could let go of it completely, I might finally be able to move on.
These days, Toby was the happiest. He thought Samuel was moving in to live with us. While Samuel worked, Toby hovered around him, unable to contain his excitement.
Toby’s tether to this world was loosening. He would likely leave before me. If he wanted to spend more time close to Samuel now, I saw no reason to stop him.
